You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Randomize
