She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Randomize
