Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I could make wine with my vomit
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize