you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize
