Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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