I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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