We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
