i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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