i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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