My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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