best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize