i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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