i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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