please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
