Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
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