my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
