Texts From Last Night

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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Its not alright that i make out with a manican.

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  (404): Its not alright that i make out with a manican. http://tfl.nu/ol2k
  Replies (4) Good night (611) Bad night (885)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"

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  (602): I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on" http://tfl.nu/nkzh
  Replies (17) Good night (701) Bad night (3255)
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  (415): View more from California

  The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.

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  (415): The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now. http://tfl.nu/v0wm
  Replies (34) Good night (3002) Bad night (1032)
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  (870): View more from Arkansas

  just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.

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  (870): just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here. http://tfl.nu/j596
  Replies (6) Good night (4192) Bad night (606)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?

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  (214): I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him? http://tfl.nu/482n
  Replies (88) Good night (969) Bad night (9940)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.

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  (978): Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either. http://tfl.nu/z8zq
  Replies (25) Good night (1633) Bad night (3300)
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  (805): View more from California

  I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.

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  (805): I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax. http://tfl.nu/bw4v
  Replies (8) Good night (927) Bad night (1754)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?

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  (248): THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday? http://tfl.nu/raf6
  Replies (14) Good night (1878) Bad night (906)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent

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  (860): Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent http://tfl.nu/cikk
  Replies (7) Good night (869) Bad night (389)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.

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  (919): If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier. http://tfl.nu/u3me
  Replies (10) Good night (869) Bad night (434)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.

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  (501): Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point. http://tfl.nu/0fss
  Replies (5) Good night (416) Bad night (208)
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night

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  (620): Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night http://tfl.nu/e9ja
  Replies (1) Good night (468) Bad night (178)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.

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  (850): I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind. http://tfl.nu/d3v3
  Replies (5) Good night (270) Bad night (574)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.

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  (604): Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok. http://tfl.nu/aeg5
  Replies (2) Good night (484) Bad night (268)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.

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  (+44): He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up. http://tfl.nu/t0cr
  Replies (1) Good night (1384) Bad night (173)

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