Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Randomize
