how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
