new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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