So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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