We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Enjoy the penises
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
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