her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
