Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize