Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize