that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize