she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Let the clothes fall where they may.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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