I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.