I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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