Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
