Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize