It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
