please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
The ass gains better be worth it
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