Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
no you cant smoke seaweed
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
He shit in the fireplace
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Randomize
