It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
