but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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