I looked at my own cervix.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
