his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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