I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
