There is no way he is gay with that hair.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
