She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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