Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
