would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
