WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
