love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
