I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
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