Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
