I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize