chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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