so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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