So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
